$@*%!!!!

We have been engaged for four months. Holy crap.

I thought, 14-month engagement, pleeeennnnty of time to accomplish everything I want, including but not limited to:

• lose a bunch of weight
• blog regularly
• check off the things on my wedding DIY list

Well, a couple days ago, I was partaking in my daily block-out-the-world-therapy of Weddingbee, when I got hit with a BAM moment.

(image, then BAM added by me of course)

Weddingbee, for those who do not know, is like the Mecca of internet wedding blog world. It's a collection of internationally-chosen bloggers (engaged and married) who write about their experiences in wedding planning, relationships, family, etc. I became addicted to the Bee about a year ago after my awesome twinsie Andrea told me about it (Yes, Pete and I really have been planning our wedding for THAT long). It immediately became one of my goals to someday become a writer for the Bee. It's a very selective application process, and you cannot apply unless it's within a certain time-frame of your wedding. And of course, you have to have an active personal blog for your application to be based upon. SO, for those of you who haven't already figured it out...I pretty much only started this blog because of Weddingbee, in the hopes that within my ridiculously long engagement I would have enough time to get my blog going and acceptable for Bee status.

Okay, okay, I was telling a story here, right? Yes. So I was reading the Bee, specifically a post by a brand new Bee (Miss Handbag), when I happen to glance over at her wedding date: March 2011. *Enter mental expletives here* March??? March is only 2 months before MAY.

This made me realize that the earliest I can apply is in just two months. Which led me to my next realization of the fact that four months of our engagement have already passed...and we are now less than 300 days out. Which led to my realization of how much I have NOT done.

• I have not lost any weight. Instead I have gained at least 5 lbs since our engagement, bringing me up to the most I have ever weighed in my life.
• I have not been blogging as much I want to. I keep doing homework instead (how boring is that??)
• I am officially two months behind on my DIY schedule. Being broke and deciding that I must completely RE-make our save-the-dates will do that to you.

I have been so stressed out by summer school and money problems and work issues that I haven't done anything that I actually want to be doing. I keep hearing the voice of Ferris Beuller in my head:

Life moves by pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around, you could miss it.

I've missed a lot in the past few months. And I'm sick of it. I'm not happy.

It's time for some changes, dammit.

I have plans. I'll be updating soon.

Anyone else out there feel like life is moving a bit too fast for your taste?