I love you, no matter how old.

Dear readers, you probably think this post is some sweet diatribe of how much I love my soon-to-be-husband.

You are wrong.

This post is for my other love, Mr. George Clooney, who is celebrating his...gasp...50th Birthday today.

10 years ago today, Brittany and I made a cake for George. Sadly my pre-wedding diet does not allow for a cake tonight, but I would like to put my "#1 Fan" hat on and wish my George a happy birthday, as I have every 6th of May, since I was 12 years old.  Some things you just never grow out of. :)

I love you, Mr. Clooney, no matter how old. :)

The Deadline

Ladies and Gentleman, may I hear your thunderous applause! Today is the first day of May.

It is officially the month of our wedding.  And it is also my self-made deadline for DIY projects, planning, organizing, stressing, or even caring about the details.

You may recall my post back in August about my crazy 11-month wedding schedule, and where I also mentioned how adamant I am about NOT repeating the awfulness that ensued with my amount of stress during my first wedding many, many years ago.

Well, I am proud to say that my craziness really did pay off.  We did get behind schedule and added a ton of things to the list within the past 2 months (including another bridesmaid!).  And over the past month we have spent every single day off shopping and crafting, every single evening balancing homework and projects and planning, and our apartment has not been anywhere near clean for at least 5 weeks.
(Exhibit A: The Bride and welcome bags in the living room)

BUT, here it is, May 1st, and I have completed everything on my list (with the exception of 4 small projects that cannot be done until the week before the wedding, such as packing for the whole shebang).

So, for those who are curious, here is the rundown on some of the DIY wedding projects Pete and I have completed, almost entirely by ourselves (with the help of Brittany, Andrea or Ryan on a few things) over the past year:

Self-designed Save-The-Dates*
Four Flower Girl Buckets*
Custom Soda Labels*
Engagement-photo Guest Book
Self-designed and built 5-tier cupcake stand
Self-designed Invitations*
Hand cut envelope liners
Self-designed and assembled programs*
Hand drawn Las Vegas map*
Hand-made jewelry for bridemaids, flower girls, and others
Hand-made party dress (that ended up being too small so it's completely useless)
Flower Girl accessories including fabric rose pins & hair flower clips
Custom cuff-links
Self-designed welcome brochures
Personalized dress hangers
Personalized (and glitter-ized) Bachelorette Party Shirts*
Personalized, hand-painted Aisle Runner
Welcome Bags including personalized letters, lollipop favors and Las Vegas Survival Kits
Menu Stands and Menus*
Personalized Kids Coloring Books
Photo slideshow
Handmade thank you cards
(All things marked with * were actually done twice due to my perfectionist personality, my hard drive's death, or other factors)

Okay that made me exhausted just writing it.  The point is, Pete and I have tried very hard to make our wedding special and a true reflection of us, within the confines of our tiny little budget, and hopefully the next few weeks will be as stress-free as possible so we can enjoy the much-awaited weekend in peace and good health.

2.5 weeks to go!

I'll be your Little Bug forever.

Last week I was watching the first episode of Dr. Phil I had seen in like 2 years.  Aside from high school flashbacks to Andrea's couch, it was pretty uneventful.  It was about some teenage boy who has been on drugs, stealing from his parents, and altogether circling the drain.  At some point during the show, Ryan woke up from his nap and came to crawl on to my lap.  With sudden fears of someday raising a teenager in the horrific culture of this world, I asked him if he could just stay my baby forever.

He hugged me and said "I'll be your little Bug forever, Mommy."
Melted. My. Heart.

I remembered that moment as I was just looking through some pictures of the little Bug and thought maybe I should post some recent pictures that have not found their way to facebook.
So, I present to you, in all his amazingness, my perfect little man.

Your blue eyes looking back at me...

Sometimes there are songs I just can't get out of my head.  As I was catching up on some blogs today, I saw a beautiful picture of a woman walking down the aisle with her father...and this song flooded my brain.  My oldest brother will be walking me down the aisle at my wedding, not my father.  And while most of the time this fact doesn't bother me in the slightest...when I hear this song, I cry.  I realize that most people may not understand the meaning...but I just had to write it down.

Sometimes I think about you
Wonder if you're out there somewhere thinking 'bout me
And would you even recognize
The woman that your little girl has grown up to be

'Cause I look in the mirror and all I see
Are your blue eyes looking back at me
They're the only thing you ever gave to me at all.

Oh, I hear the weather's nice in California
There's sunny skies as far as I can see
If you ever come back home to Carolina
I wonder what you'd say to me

Did you think I didn't need you here?
To hold my hand, to dry my tears?
Did you even miss me through the years at all?

Oh, I hear the weather's nice in California
There's sunny skies as far as I can see
If you ever come back home to Carolina
I wonder what you'd say to me

Forgiveness is such a simple word
But it's so hard to do when you've been hurt

Oh, I hear the weather's nice in California
And just in case you're wondering about me
From now on I won't be in Carolina
Your little girl is off, your little girl is off
Your little girl is off to Tennessee

What is it about weddings and funerals..?

I don't remember where I heard that line, but I saw it on some movie or TV show recently. I think it was Brothers & Sisters? (excellent show - go watch).  Anyway, it continued with the pondering question of why people seem to be a a bit nuts when it comes to events such as weddings and funerals.  And with only 4 weeks til D-Day, Pete and I have been pondering the same issue.  (And it makes me want to watch My Big Fat Greek Wedding.)

Simply stated...our "small, intimate, simple wedding" has brought about an unexpected amount of drama, bad behavior, awkward conversations, family issues, and luckily even some unexpected happy developments over the past 14 months...and it gets thicker as we move closer to the wedding.

It seems like a balancing act - in the beginning, it was just Pete and I stressing about everything, overreacting, and letting the wedding turn us into crazy people (okay, I use the word us pretty lightly - it should say me).  But now that we are finally past all the stress and pretty content in our excitement-induced haze of projects and squealing and honeymoon daydreaming...everyone else around us seems to be going to the Dark Side.  Due to the fact that I will not publicly discuss the details of the many wedding party/family/friends/attire/guest list issues that have been going on in relation to our wedding, the most I can say is that I am truly puzzled by the fact that weddings (and maybe funerals?) have this weird ability to invoke such madness.

On the flip side, I am so thrilled that our wedding has also been responsible for renewed friendships (Britt & Holli - I'm love you both), much overdue vacations (Mariah, that's for you!), an excuse to talk to my sisters-in-law more, a chance for Ryan to spend a week with his cousins that he rarely ever sees, and so many wonderful things that have come from the hours and hours Pete and I have spent together planning the whole thing.

It really is a bit like a typical episode of Brothers & Sisters, now that I think about it.  There's a group of people who know each other too well and not at all, a lot drama, usually some secrets, some fighting, some laughing, some growing...and in the end, there's a lot of food and wine and a lot of love. That's what family (and friendships) are all about, right?  <3

The Return of the Jedi...

Okay I may not be a Jedi, but I have yoga pants with the name Kenobi on them and a pair of Chewbacca slippers...and I have gloriously returned to my blog...so it's the best title I could think of.  (Plus, it's Star Wars Saturday on channel 25.)

I have not posted anything in (gasp) almost 8 months. There are several reasons why.
First, my computer crashed. And I hate Pete's Mac...so I stayed away from the interwebs for a while.  Secondly, last summer was incredibly rough for me (as my previous posts suggested). I was dealing with bouts of depression, incredibly difficult financial situations, parenting struggles, a lack of family support and one of the most miserably hot summers Phoenix has seen in years.  Basically, I had no motivation and nothing good to write about.  Additionally, at some point, I experienced an epiphany while reading a post on Weddingbee that made me completely change my mind about wanting to become a Weddingbee blogger myself (which was the original intention of starting this blog).  So I disappeared.

Thankfully, things in GinaPeteRyanWorld have improved incredibly since my last post (with the exception of the the fact that I hate our new apartment, but that's another story).  Pete is thriving at his new job.  Ryan's behavior changed dramatically once we got out of the "terrorist threes."  My relationships with my brothers have improved and Pete's relationships with his siblings have been rebuilt.  I reconnected with one of my best friends and love that we get to see each other so much more now. My Love and I shared a weekend in October that strengthened and healed our relationship in ways I never expected.  In the past 8 months, I survived the evil-ness of summer school, the crapy-ness of fall semester, my first teaching internship, and I am just a few weeks away from finishing yet another semester of school and my second internship.  All the while, we have also pulled together plans and endless DIY projects for our wedding, which (holy cow) is only 5 weeks away!!!

A few friends have mentioned that they miss my blog posts, so I have decided to give it another go.  With our wedding creeping closer everyday, my excitement is building and I need some way to let it out, so I figured here would be a good place for others to count down with us and share the joy. :)

That's all for now - Luke, Han and Leia are about to be fed to the Sarlacc and I've got to finish sewing up my post-reception party dress for the big day. Happy Saturday!

My Motherboard, My Self

Yes, that is a title of a Sex and the City Episode. Ya know, the one where Carrie's laptop crashes and she loses "her whole life"?? 



Well it happened to me.  My laptop's hard drive decided to commit suicide.  And, like Carrie, I did not backup.  (I know, shoot me now).  Which means, in no uncertain terms, that everything is gone.  Specifically, everything in my precious Wedding folder.  My budget spreadsheets, inspiration photos, saved blog posts, to-do lists and schedules.  Even worse is the fact that last month's DIY schedule task was to create all of the preliminary designs for everything paper-related.  That was hours of designing favor tags, programs, soda bottle labels, coloring books, iteneraries, and a ridiculous handrawn map - and now it's all been lost to cyberland.  ("In cyberland, we only drink...diet coke." Kudos to those who know what the hell that means).

Oh and did I mention that I also lost all of my photos, including the gratuitous ring porn that I have yet to share of my engagement ring, the pictures of my wedding dress and shopping experience, and adorable pictures and videos of my baby from Christmas?  And the video of Pete's proposal. Yeah, I'm mad.

So what's the lesson in this, my dear readers?  LISTEN!!! when everyone tells you to backup your stuff. I cannot stress this enough, especially if you are planning a wedding.  That *precious wedding folder* is not so precious when you realize you have to create it from scratch all over again.

Are Carrie Bradshaw and me the only ones this stupid, or can anyone else out there feel my pain?